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Return of the Ancestors

Posted on May 2nd, 2009 by Jaia : Dreamer Jaia
I have sat at the keyboard several times, attempting to put some words to the twelve day experience of the Return of the Ancestor gathering here in Northern Arizona from April 18-28th.  It seems like eons ago now, even though it has only been a few days.  I am wondering, was it just a dream?  I am wondering, is it all just a dream.  Well, of course....

But doesn't it seem so real?  Isn't it so easy to forget with all of those important things that pull us off the path, out of our deep intention to remember what is real?  Remember the dream.....

The first few days of the gathering took place on a field at Sedona High School.....the Condor Dancers opened with a beautiful and dream-like presentation.  These kind of things manage to take me into that otherworld, if I don't already happen to be there, reminding me of this worlds fabrication of phenomenon.  What is real?  What is time?  Who are we really, and what are we really doing here?

I was a volunteer at the event, with an agreement to work two of the days, and from what the event director shared, this group of condor dancers came from such a remote region that the messenger bringing the invitation to attend the gathering had to travel up a mountain on a donkey and wasn't even heard from for three weeks.  The invitation needed to be deeply considered, prayed over, and intended upon~~and in the meantime to even obtain a visa, plane tickets needed to be purchased.  So, after the invitation was accepted, and plane tickets were purchased, everyone then waited upon officials to approve their visas.  Thankfully, they were approved.

Something that was mentioned several times by many of the elders was a world without borders....where all people were able to travel freely.....and although this was not the first time I had heard of this, it was the first time I had a full vision and feeling of existing in that world.  The astonishing simplicity of a world where all people travel freely on Mother Earth, without needing permission from government officials, without old paradigm ideas of separation and fear.  Would there really be masses trying to flood the borders of the US?  I know everyone has been sold on the American Dream, but there are many who have been able to see the shadow side of excessive materialism and elements of the American nightmare of pharma/agri/corporate rule, the loss of soul and original thought, loss of connection to the earth.  Opening all borders at this time would probably result in chaos since the collective consciousness still resides in a place of fear and separation for the most part.  Are we really returning to a place of connection and peace?  A place where our spirituality connects us with the Mother Earth, rather than separates us from Her and looks are Her only as something to use and conquer for our needs, rather that love, support, sustain and learn from?

One the second day of the gathering I felt my feet touching the earth, like hands on a drum, as the Lakota led a peace pipe ceremony.  It was more than symbolic, more than a simple ceremony, it was the dawning of a new age~~ as hundreds gathered in widening circles around the elders, drums rumbled and singers sang songs in their native tongues........  at a certain point a large group of us began to dance in a large circle surrounding everyone, traveling around and around, on the periphery of the happening......the group from Peru was playing their music now and the sound of it reminded me of Celtic music.....and with my mainly Welsh, and also Irish, Russian, Spanish, etc. bloodline, this was sparking something as many of us began to spontaneously dance in small circles at that point, spinning each other around, catching the next person in the crook of our elbow, spinning on to the next.  I could almost see the fairies dancing with us.  From this a few people began to form a bridge with their arms and had us run underneath, and after coming out the other side, becoming the next link of the bridge.  After going through several times, and after the music died down, I looked to my left to see that Grandmother/Elder Marguerite had joined us, smiling and laughing in the game.  

The day before she had stood up to address the crowd, after many men had spoken about the feminine energy, how the feminine energy was becoming the predominant energy on the planet, how the poles were shifting (the irony that mainly men were speaking about the feminine was not lost on most of the people there!), she stood up and in a booming voice, followed closely by the english translator, proceeded to thank all of the men, all of the beautiful messages, but, in a nutshell, none of them would be there without a woman, thank you very much.  This was met by loud applause~ her confidence and playful and outspoken ways were infectious, and it made me even more aware of how it really is time for the women to stand in their wisdom, in their power, in their authentic goddess self.  
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Return of the Ancestors pt II

Posted on May 7th, 2009 by Jaia : Dreamer Jaia
The insights and integrations and inspirations are continuing to come through as my daughter and I are now back in California.  We made the drive from Sedona/Cottonwood to Palm Desert  and even though I ventured back into the LA area in our tow car yesterday, Spice Girl is happily parked and hooked up in Palm Desert ( I know, I know, Spice Girl is a silly name for a 32 foot RV, for one's home, but, they had the color listed as spice and it came spontaneously-- I told my daughter I wouldn't call it that, but she'll never read this :)    A friend once said, Spice Girl?! Well, she's big boned I guess.

Anyways, after getting back to La La Land and Agapeland, www.agapelive.com, back with those who have been my spiritual comrades since I first found my way to the community in 2000, well, things that occurred at the gathering began to take on an even deeper meaning.  There is so much appreciation for those that choose to hold a high space of love, compassion and joy- even if it doesn't get done perfectly, it gets done.  Even if at times we seem to bumble along on our path, at least we are on the path, becoming ever more aware of all the trappings of ego, illusion, and, well, planned pandemics and planned profits for big pharma, and at the same time, ever more aware of our True Identity of "Inexhaustable Good" as the founder Michael Beckwith would say. 

During the gathering I connected with several of the elders, many of which lived lives so completely different than we can imagine.  Many were healers and shamans, and there was one in particular who captured my attention as a group of us had lunch under a shade tree in Dead Horse State Park in Cottonwood, Arizona.  

I was a working volunteer that day, sporting my neon green 'harmony keeper'  t-shirt, helping to direct traffic.  Actually, I was not much more than a landmark by lunch time. Just someone for the person at the post ahead to refer to : "see that girl sitting under that tree in that bright green t-shirt?  - turn left there".

So, I was happy and delighted when my post tree was chosen by several people to have lunch under, including a few elders and a translator.  It turns out one of the elders, from Bolivia, was only 26.  Not really an elder, but asked to come along on the trip, and if there was any consolation, the kids in his village referred to him as 'old man'.  He was one of those shaman shapeshifters to be sure, since every time I looked at him he looked at little different.  In fact, when he first sat down he looked like an elder to me and it was only after he started talking that I saw he wasn't that old, but then when he shared his age when someone asked-- wow-- now way.   

He got to talking, through the translator, and it was clear he had a gift for channeling the divine energy through~  it was then that I realized that although I had heard a lot of wisdom in the previous two days, and had definitely felt some shifts with the many ceremonies, I had heard a lot of people talking about things, not so much with the energy.  There were exceptions, but a lot of it was talk about, rather than talk with. Some in the mind, rather than the heart. There was talk about the Mayan Calendar, what we are coming to, the ways we are destroying the planet, the ways we can make it better, how we are all one, but, this talk under the tree was different.  
After a little while he looked up and there were three birds flying in a small circle- not ordinary birds, but eagles.  These same three had been flying above me when I was playing my music out by the green river the day before, and when he said that birds gather when he speaks I wondered if the birds gathered for my singing in the same way, and as soon as I wondered it I felt a strong sense of peace, a gentle kundalini, a confirmation.  
When someone asked him how we can lessen our attachment to money, to not be bound by financial concerns and make them our primary focus, he picked up a plastic container of hummus that was sitting on the picnic blanket and said it was the problem.  We all stared at him, waiting to see what he meant, this old-young-old-young man, sitting there on the grass, under that tree, holding a little plastic container, saying it was the problem of our obsessive money issues.  It seemed silly for a moment, until he began to speak again.  He said that in his village everyone works and helps in growing the food.  People help to plant, to water, to harvest, to mulch.......no one pays for their food.  He said that when you have to give money for what you put into your body you become connected to money in a way that is not healthy.  
Now, that is a paraphrase, but it was the first time this connection, this thought, had ever been entertained in my brain.  Wow.  That is deep.  Nature doesn't pay for her seeds, or water, or for the bees to pollenate, and when our physical survival is based on our ability to acquire something that is not even natural to us, it a way it makes a part of us unnatural, or at least dependent on something unnatural.  Hmmm.... amazing food for thought.  He went on to say that it is a little different when you pay for something that you wear, since it goes on the outside of your body, and not on the inside.  
Now, I'm not saying that we are all contaminated with money or tainted by the unholy and damned dollar, but, what I am saying is what he said made me pause and think, and, I do believe, tap further into the vision of a world where people all work together to feed each other, take care of each other, love each other- not say, well, you don't have any of this money stuff, so you starve, sorry, I have my twenty houses to take care of.  There's just something a little, you know, weird about that.....
which brings me to the weirdness I felt being on the reservation, but I think we'll save that for next time......gotta start heading back to the desert.....

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Return of the Ancestors pt III

Posted on May 7th, 2009 by Jaia : Dreamer Jaia
I have only been on Native American reservation land once before, when I was part of a pilgrimage that I was hired to drive a van for a few years before.  We travelled to many well known sites and one day after a tour on Hopiland we were invited to come and see where our tour guide and his family lived.  It reminded me of being in Africa, or in India, where the roads were dirt and the houses were not much more than some plaster, rocks, and prayers.  Even though I live in an RV now (admittedly a cushy one with all the fixins) I have always felt a little, you know, not quite right in seeing a people who were there first ending up with the short end of the stick so to speak.  I mean, we can say all is fair in love and war, we can call it capitalism, call it progress and even survival of the fittest, and we do. But there's also another word for all of it, it seems to me: unfair.  We can make all kinds of rationalizations and intellectual projections, economic demographics, racist generalizations, and at the end of the day there is still something wrong in Denmark, or, in this case, Tuba City, Arizona.

Due to some kind of construction injunction in 1966, the paved road stopped far before reaching the house where we were to gather, and from what I understood due to this injunction about 80% of the homes in this very large area were without electricity. As I drove onto the dirt road, following the well placed 'Return of the Ancestors' hand printed signs with arrows, there were times, due to the excess windblown sand on the road, combined with some pretty deep groves, that I wondered if I was going to get stuck.  The 4x4 was really coming in handy at that point, even though the real reason for getting a 4x4 ford escape hybrid was so that I could tow her behind Spice Girl.  And, yes, she has a name too, Queen Jasmine. 
 
When I saw the busses that were carrying the elders come down that same road a little while later I went into spontaneous prayer, then noticed they didn't end up coming in all the way.  And, after they went around another way and came up to where we were, they didn't stay there long.  'Where did the busses go?', someone asked.  'They don't like the wind,' someone answered.  
Well, they weren't the only ones.
After we had gathered, and talked, and built a huge bonfire (with ten feet logs, probably so they wouldn't blow away), and om'd and sang, I made my way over to the back end of Queen Jasmine where a warm sleeping bag was laid out.  I had slept there the night before when we stayed in the Grand Canyon park.  It was quite comfortable, more comfortable than expected.  I ended up pretty glad that my enthusiastic offers for people to come up there with me were not taken up on- it did turn out to be much smaller than i first thought.  Comfy, but snug.  
I woke up the next morning to sound of that hard wind and occasional sand hitting the car.  When I opened the door to leave later that day the gust was so strong I couldn't open it at first.  And, after the sunrise ceremony, and after frybread in the gathering house, one of the Dine elders said the wind blew like that for three months, all Spring, and that it was a good day for them.  
I thought of my friend Temba who started a home building project for a family in Pine Creek,   www.naturescompassion.com   He started a whole movement and by the end of the deal it may be a whole eco-village.  I could see those big white windmills going in the wind- my God, the electricity they could get there from those!  

The sunrise ceremony had started, with maybe a hundred or so making the early call around the fire before dawn.  There was a song, with hand motions, and then one of the elders (from a region in Canada I was told afterwards) came forward inside the circle, saying prayers, dancing, yelling, running, spinning.  It was an odd ceremony honestly.  At times when he would turn and whisper something he would almost lose his balance, making him look drunk, striking me as so oddball looking I would have to hold in a laugh, then, a moment later, some brilliant phrase and delicate and graceful movement would take my breath away.  It was like life, I thought.  Ridiculous and kind of rude, uninteresting or banal one moment, and then, boom, daringly, astoundingly and profoundly brilliant the next.  It was so unscripted at times though it had that mad quality of motley crew-ness, of crassness, bordering on being a bit rude to the senses, and something that I had heard the first day from one of the elders rang true: when ceremony becomes ritual it loses it's life force and power.  Well, this was certainly not ritual- it was a true ceremony, that's for sure.  One thing about a lot of these ceremonies I noticed as well- they were long.  The kind of long where you were forced into the practice of watching your mind go into story and judgment, and were forced to watch your breath, you know, pushed beyond your boredom point at times and had to practice the fine art of patience.  Oh, the joys of the western conditioned mind.  Expecting to be entertained every second of every day with billboards and commercials and flashy nonsense.  I kept having to remind myself of where I was and what we were participating in~ we had gathered for Mother Earth, for Peace on Earth.  I was quite impressed I have to say with everyone's patience level and respect for the proceedings.  It was actually a wonderful diversion from the usual diversion, you know.  

Anyways, after the medicine man's prayer movement, for lack of a better term, guessing there probably isn't one, a Native American woman in the circle began to speak as well.  She was speaking in her native tongue, and after a few minutes her strong voice began to break and she began to force her words through tears.  She broke into english for part of it, apologizing to the water, to the animals, to the air, to our Mother, asking for forgiveness for what has been done to her.  Pretty soon many of those in the circle were in tears, maybe a few thinking, hey, I am living a fairly ecologically sustainable life, but that didn't seem to be the point.  We had a responsibility to the Earth, if we had to apologize on the behalf of some of our brothers and sisters, so be it.  And, come on, living in America, or any other industrialized and westernized city, you can pretty much bet you are contributing to the destruction of Mother Earth on some level.  It's just the way we've set it all up.

Then there was the irony, that not too far from the ceremonial fire was a flagpole with the American flag raised up high, whipping in the wind, whipping so hard at times it seemed like it was going to rip in two.  But it didn't.  It held strong the whole time; invincible like.
A poem came from the experience a day or two later.

I ended up leaving later that morning after the fry bread. I'm used to eating raw vegan, and it was all a bit too much. Maybe eating the fry bread was part of some kind of penance.  Some kind of major guilt trip feeling.  It was maybe just a little too much for this middle class white girl, who, from the beginning had her mother read books with Native American themes to her over and over, who married a Native American man, and whose child is part Native American, and who, even though her skin is white, part of her Spirit is Native~~and maybe still lives in a bit of a conflict about that odd combination.  Or, maybe it doesn't have anything to do with that at all.  Maybe it is just about that other part.  The part about it being supremely unfair.  Yeah, that's it.

The Forgotten People. 
Meeting for years,
again.
Praying for help.

One day it comes
It must feel like a miracle!
Hundreds of beings
from all over the world,
the Return of the Ancestors
Gathering as One

The Spring wind
throwing sand in our faces
scolding us
forcing us
to remember
our brothers and sisters
on the reservation
where have you been? it asks

The wind 
it is now trying to rip
the American flag that flies above us,
but the flag wins,
again,
and the bonfire burns hot
as the sunrise ceremony
gets under way
Another day,
a good day, as it was called,
it blows like this all Spring.

A woman’s prayer
starting strong and even,
begins to burn hot like the fire,
and whip in the wind like the flag,
it comes spitting out
with tears, now,
it comes from the hollow place inside, now,
where the forgotten ones reside,
howling, begging, desperate,
and her tears become our tears
as her pain becomes our pain
we carry it with her
as her love becomes our love
and we travel together
down a road
in a land where 
harsh and relentless
conditions
are called
‘good’
and where a people who
have been
forgotten
have now been remembered

The large circle forms again
after fry bread and fruit
mutton soup and blue corn mush
in the meeting place
And those whose eyes
are used to eating sand
in the Spring
are still
But those who are new to the land,
rub their eyes like children
crying
And open their hearts to the ones
who call themselves 
forgotten 
and will maybe now
or maybe in time
call themselves 
something
else

Depending on 
maybe
if we will remember
or forget them 
again


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The New Activism

Posted on May 14th, 2009 by Jaia : Dreamer Jaia
As the desert sun began it's early climb, and I found my way back to this world, I found these words in my head.  
The new activism.
Hmmm......what?

Always love these things that come from the in between space, the space between dreams and reality, it was where the subtitle of my book came from: "how to ditch the life your mind created and start living the one your soul intended", and how original songs, solutions and visions have found their way into this world.
Sometimes they are difficult to translate and I never quite figure out what they mean. That wasn't the case this morning.
When I sat with what these words meant it was fairly evident right away~  in fact, there are probably many books out already on the topic.  

Carrying signs and picketing is passe, writing to our congressman, old hat.  Yes, we can still do these kinds of things, but many of us have taken Gandhi's words to heart by being the change we wish to see in the world.  This is the new activism.

The new activism doesn't whine about others not changing, or complain about the way things are, it puts the ball in our court, it puts our money where our mouth is, and inspires us to clean up our own act, while inspiring others to do the same.  And, not standing on a 'holier than thou' pedestal, but with a sense of enthusiasm and joy. 

If we want peace, instead of making our way to the street with signs, we need to first make our way to our meditation mat.  In the same way, if we want clean air and water, we have to be the change we wish to see in the world.  How can we expect to have a clean environment while our inner environment is full of toxins?  It doesn't really make sense to expect any different.  

How can we continue to ignore the fact that it takes about 2,500 gallons to produce one pound of meat ( a median estimate), while it takes about 25-35 gallons to produce a pound of various veggies?  Not to mention the waste factory farmed animals produce, creating what are known as dead zones in various water systems.  With all of the talk about water issues, why is this information not on the front page?  

What's so great about the new activism, is you have total control.  You are not dependent on politicians to change laws, which could take decades, which we do not have, or never happen, given the many kickbacks, or incentives for things to stay the same. You don't have to wait for things to change out there, you get to be that change.  How cool is that?  After you've changed, you can still get out in the streets with signs and still write letters and make calls, but you won't feel like a victim to a system anymore because you will see the real power is with the people, and our ability to change our ways.  It is a good time to take responsibility for our environment, for our inner environment, and as more of us do, we will watch the outer environment be the change as well.

It's no accident I woke up with this on my mind, since I went to sleep with our 40 day upcoming cleanse in there~~  it starts on May 24th and there are still a few spots left~~ see the info below and drop me a line if you'd like to participate in a branch of the new activism :)
Happy changing~~Happy Being~~



Living Raw: A 40 Day Transformation through 

 

Food, Faith, and Fearless Living

 

 

 

         40 Day Living Food & Juice Cleanse

 

Do any of these describe you?

You have mood swings and cravings that make you feel out of control and depressed

You have noticed that you lack the energy and level of health you once had

You want to do a cleanse but don’t know where to start and would like support

You are interested in releasing addictions to processed foods, sugar, meat, dairy, etc.

You would like the mental and emotional support of doing a cleanse with a group

You want to build your immune system, release weight, and/or glow with health

You want to eat in a way that supports the environment 

You are going through a transition in your life and want to support the process by releasing physical toxins/old energy

 

If so, on May 24th we will embark on a 40 day journey of transformation into greater levels of radiant health and wholeness, greater body awareness, and greater trust in ourselves, empowering us to take control of our health and life. 

 Program includes: 

*Info pack with cleanse outline, shopping list, recipes, resource links, sent via email

*Getting started conference call on May 23rd including Q&A and intention setting

*Daily email sent, including daily checklist, quality of the day, and nutrition information piece to keep you inspired and on track

*Conference calls twice a week, participation optional, but recommended

*One on one support via email or phone for any questions or concerns during the cleanse

Only $250 investment for this 40 day intensive and life-changing program


"Jaia is in the forefront of the spiritual and living food movement.  She is compassionate, caring and wise, making her a great coach on all levels. I participated in a 40 day cleanse January of 2008 and it changed my life completely. If you want to cleanse your body and increase your health, energy and vitality then participate in the 40 day cleanse with Jaia, you will be grateful you did. ~~~Trish Sharpe"


 

From early childhood Jaia was haunted by a vision of a world of universal love and peace, as well as a persistent questioning as to why there were things such as war, poverty, and disease. Conventional answers led her to an isolated and addicted life experience for many years, but after a moment of illumination in 1996, her life turned around and she began her path as a teacher, healer and awakened artist. She began a vegan living food path in 2001, is a certified living food chef, certified living food nutrition educator, and is co-founder and current director of Agape International Living Food Ministry. She was event coordinator for Juice Fast LA, where over 80 people fasted for 7 days on green juice under the guidance of Dr. Gabriel Cousens. She also holds a Masters Degree in Spiritual Psychology, is an author, singer-songwriter, and is the mother of a teenage daughter. She began facilitating classes in 2000 and has taught, facilitated and performed in many venues, including overseas and federal prison. 




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